Nights are usually the worst, I'm so used to hearing Josh's voice telling me goodnight.
I hope he knows I pray for him every day, and that i'm always thinking of him.
I try to keep my mind set to positive, but sometimes I just get discouraged.
I know he is doing the right thing, I mean he is already an amazing marine!
I think i'll write to him tonight. Although I don't have his address yet it will be
good for me to express some things to him.
So let me throw this out there,
how do other girlfriends, wives, husbands, daughters, partners, whatever deal with being so lonely?
My roommate had her "love interest" over last night, we all just watched movies together but it was hard to see them happy and lovey cuddled on the couch, with Josh so far away. It's funny how sometimes you take for granted a hug. God I miss his hugs.
So everyone, what do you think? How do you cope? Let me know.
The good, the bad, the lonely
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
DAY TWO
Tears,
they flow freely, easily, currently
I can't help it.
Smiles,
are few and far between these days
But i'm trying.
My heart,
is his always
this I hope he knows.
My future,
is bright and waiting
for him to come home.
The Navy,
is calling,
i'm answering with yes.
Poetry is something I used to write all the time, and I guess today that is what my heart is telling me to write. So let me explain the last stanza to you.
Ever since my junior year in high school i was leaning towards going into the navy, going as far as starting the process of applying for NROTC which is a program where the Navy would send me to school all while I was enlisted, so I would go in as an officer. Well because of a horrible requiter, who seemed only to care about a paycheck I decided not to.
I guess everything happens for a reason because if I had chosen to go into the Navy at that time I never would have not been here when Josh came home from boot camp and furthermore I would not have had the chance to tell him my feelings.
Which brings us to now... the Navy has been on my mind ever sense i got back from Josh's boot camp graduation, I'm not sure why, I've just always felt that I was supposed to join the military, so what's a girl to do? Of course ask her parents, especially her dad :)
Talking to my parents was a huge relief! They thought it was a great idea! My dad even set up a meeting with a recruiter and on top of that went with me!
Here is where the story gets interesting, let me tell you I'm not the skinniest girl you will ever meet, I've been athletic my entire life, and of course as a college student there is a lot of eating out, anyways when we did my height to weight ratio I was over by oh i don't know 16 pounds, I'm a short girl, dang. So here is to loosing 20 pounds before I can start the paperwork. But ya know I'm not going to get discouraged, my goal is to run every day I started yesterday November 1st and I WILL loose the weight, get in shape, and make my family, and my marine proud.
I'm sure most of you are wondering, well where does Josh stand on this issue, well it's kind of complicated. We figure, we will be apart no matter what for at least four years, and we are both willing to wait that long to start our new lives together, but while he has his Marine career as an anchor, I really don't have that. Yes I'm in college furthering my education, but I feel stagnant. Like I really don't belong here, that God has bigger and better plans for my future, and I feel it's the Navy.
Who would have thought the Marine Girlfriend would turn into the Navy Girl.
they flow freely, easily, currently
I can't help it.
Smiles,
are few and far between these days
But i'm trying.
My heart,
is his always
this I hope he knows.
My future,
is bright and waiting
for him to come home.
The Navy,
is calling,
i'm answering with yes.
Poetry is something I used to write all the time, and I guess today that is what my heart is telling me to write. So let me explain the last stanza to you.
Ever since my junior year in high school i was leaning towards going into the navy, going as far as starting the process of applying for NROTC which is a program where the Navy would send me to school all while I was enlisted, so I would go in as an officer. Well because of a horrible requiter, who seemed only to care about a paycheck I decided not to.
I guess everything happens for a reason because if I had chosen to go into the Navy at that time I never would have not been here when Josh came home from boot camp and furthermore I would not have had the chance to tell him my feelings.
Which brings us to now... the Navy has been on my mind ever sense i got back from Josh's boot camp graduation, I'm not sure why, I've just always felt that I was supposed to join the military, so what's a girl to do? Of course ask her parents, especially her dad :)
Talking to my parents was a huge relief! They thought it was a great idea! My dad even set up a meeting with a recruiter and on top of that went with me!
Here is where the story gets interesting, let me tell you I'm not the skinniest girl you will ever meet, I've been athletic my entire life, and of course as a college student there is a lot of eating out, anyways when we did my height to weight ratio I was over by oh i don't know 16 pounds, I'm a short girl, dang. So here is to loosing 20 pounds before I can start the paperwork. But ya know I'm not going to get discouraged, my goal is to run every day I started yesterday November 1st and I WILL loose the weight, get in shape, and make my family, and my marine proud.
I'm sure most of you are wondering, well where does Josh stand on this issue, well it's kind of complicated. We figure, we will be apart no matter what for at least four years, and we are both willing to wait that long to start our new lives together, but while he has his Marine career as an anchor, I really don't have that. Yes I'm in college furthering my education, but I feel stagnant. Like I really don't belong here, that God has bigger and better plans for my future, and I feel it's the Navy.
Who would have thought the Marine Girlfriend would turn into the Navy Girl.
Monday, November 1, 2010
DAY ONE
Josh left the Tuesday before last, it seems like so much longer then that. I guess I got so used to talking to him that when I couldn't anymore it was like my heart was getting ripped out of my body. Call me dramatic but I guess that's what love is all about. At only 18 it seems like we have the world ahead of us, by god I hope so.
When he left tuesday he left as my boyfriend, finally, so many people knew it was going to happen, it was a five year event leading up to it. I felt content and relieved that it was official, people ask me, you have only been dating for a couple weeks, how in the world can you say you love him. Well to all you skeptics out there, I loved him long before I ever became his girlfriend. Our history is more than that of a normal friendship turned romance, who knows i might just write a book one day about it.
The hardest thing right now is never knowing, when he first got to Camp Pendelton he did not go straight into combat training as planned, he was held back because of his lack of glasses. I was lucky to be able to talk to him this entire time, call me spoiled. Once he got 'picked up' as they call it he no longer had his phone. The last text was "Hey babe I have to go, I wont get my phone until late Sunday. Miss you I love You."
WHAT SUNDAY!?!? But that is so far from here! At this point it was Monday, a whole week until i could hear his voice?! I shouldn't have gotten used to it, but what's a girl to do. Sunday rolls around, Halloween.
That day was eventful helping Josh's family with their haunted house and getting costumes and makeup on, but during the whole day the thought of hearing his voice was running through my mind. FINALLY he called, he could only talk for a few minutes and my phone was turned off in my pocket, unbeknownst to me. Luckily I was at his parents house, they had to come search for me because I was working in the haunted house, amidst clowns and psycho killers.
Hearing his voice, though hoarse and achy from yelling was a relief, we only talked for a few minutes, his family wanted to say hi also, but those few minutes will have to last me until I hear from my marine again.
When he left tuesday he left as my boyfriend, finally, so many people knew it was going to happen, it was a five year event leading up to it. I felt content and relieved that it was official, people ask me, you have only been dating for a couple weeks, how in the world can you say you love him. Well to all you skeptics out there, I loved him long before I ever became his girlfriend. Our history is more than that of a normal friendship turned romance, who knows i might just write a book one day about it.
The hardest thing right now is never knowing, when he first got to Camp Pendelton he did not go straight into combat training as planned, he was held back because of his lack of glasses. I was lucky to be able to talk to him this entire time, call me spoiled. Once he got 'picked up' as they call it he no longer had his phone. The last text was "Hey babe I have to go, I wont get my phone until late Sunday. Miss you I love You."
WHAT SUNDAY!?!? But that is so far from here! At this point it was Monday, a whole week until i could hear his voice?! I shouldn't have gotten used to it, but what's a girl to do. Sunday rolls around, Halloween.
That day was eventful helping Josh's family with their haunted house and getting costumes and makeup on, but during the whole day the thought of hearing his voice was running through my mind. FINALLY he called, he could only talk for a few minutes and my phone was turned off in my pocket, unbeknownst to me. Luckily I was at his parents house, they had to come search for me because I was working in the haunted house, amidst clowns and psycho killers.
Hearing his voice, though hoarse and achy from yelling was a relief, we only talked for a few minutes, his family wanted to say hi also, but those few minutes will have to last me until I hear from my marine again.
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SOME THINGS YOU SHOULD KNOW
- USMC.GIRL
- First off i'm complicated and at times frustrating, this blog is not only for me to share how i feel about being a marine girlfriend but also to reach out to other military girlfriend, wives, husbands, daughters, etc. I want to know that i'm not alone in this and i'm sure a lot of you do too.